♥decisions..

Sunday, May 13, 2007

i shall promise myself to blog at least once a day so that i can keep this blog flowing with posts..

so the other day i was talking to denise online about uni and stuff (cos we kinda always seem to talk about the same usual stuff).. and she asked me why havent i accepted NUS's offer.. gee i guess all i can say was that i'm kind of insecure and uncertain of my future in accepting fass.. i mean, what can you do with a degree in social sciences? is my passion and faith enough to keep it going? i've seen that my stint at sentosa didnt really go well.. maybe the whole thing was that i overestimated myself! i thought that i could interact and interact well enough.. but it wasnt.. and with my '3-mins worth of passion', i really doubt my own capability.. i was secretly hoping that some miracle will come by and NUS business would reply.. i've been trying to convince myself that business is totally not my cup of tea.. well, i think i suceeded.. i was never a leader, and even when i was, i screwed things up.. its not that i didnt have a chance.. its that i didnt grasp the opportunity.. i probably didnt even realise its an opportunity! i'll hide behind, all curled up and hide my head inside the sand like an ostrich.. well what makes me think i'm aggressive and confident enough to take it in the business world? maybe its just dreaming..

then again.. no one will know it before they've tried anything! so i believe that this is what has been arranged for me, and this shall be what i should do.. there's a reason for something to happen and there is also a reason to accept it.. i should come to realise that all these i've been doing are just tools of deceit.. come on! i'm like already thinking of what hall to apply to, what course to take, what kind of life i wanna lead! what more do i have to wait!

perhaps its time i click that button, accept it, and be on my way..

Posted by faintheart at 12:11 AM